First off, I was not running the show; therefore, by all accounts I should not have been having to worry about everyone was due to be paid. So the fact that this fucker had grabbed my camera as compensation was bad enough. But now he was outside the room. In the hall. Free to roam. In a public place. In a public space where the shooting of amateur porn is actually ILLEGAL. We all looked at each other for a second in utter disbelief. What the hell? The girls followed suit and walked out quickly behind the brother. Mike followed them out along with Tad while I struggled to get some pants and a shirt on. By the time I made it out the door they were all almost down to the elevators and I had to run just to catch them before the doors opened. I jumped in with everyone. There we were all trapped together in a big shiny box about to drop down into the casino like a present wrapped perfectly for Security to open up and find a nice surprise inside.

All of us vainly tried talking the brother into handing over the camera. Nope, he was going to keep it. I wanted to jump him and just start pounding the shit out of him but not if that meant my thousand dollar camera was going to be busted beyond repair.  The doors to the elevator opened and the rows of slot machines and card tables stretched out in front of us. The noise of the machines and the smoke of a million cigarettes smoked and smoking provoked instant manic confusion. The brother bolted out and began quickly walking toward the doors. As we followed he stepped up his pace to a jogging run. He was going to make it to the doors. That couldn’t happen. I wasn’t going to let that happen. No way. My fucking camera. Mine!

I saw a security guy. He saw us all now running and was stepping up to tell us that would not be allowed in the Bally’s casino, but I didn’t have time for his lecture. We needed his help. Now! Or else it would be too late!

“Stop that guy!” I yelled, surprising the security guy, “He stole my camera!”

I was already resigned to the fact that this amateur porn shoot would not be ending up on Homegrown Video any time soon. We only wanted the sort of action where everyone is having a great time without out any need to pretend he or she is having actual fun. This shoot, if indeed there was going to be a shoot, and that was open to question, did not seem like it would fall into the sort of niche Homegrown has prided itself on and the standard which I was committed to upholding. This would be one of those days where folks have to pretend that they actually enjoy each other’s company. This would be one of those days where a great imagination and serious dedication to fucking would be required to get the job done.

Tad at last managed to persuade the brother to go wait in the suite with Sunset Thomas and watch television while we got the shoot underway. Tad escorted him down to the room. I can only imagine how happily Sunset received this son of a bitch with a smile on her face.  Mike South went to get some extra lights. I was all alone in the room with the sister and her girlfriend. Every time I tried to make some sort of pleasant small talk all I got was one syllable replies that were closer to grunts or snorts than anything actually intelligible so I gave up on trying to find any sort of chemistry in the situation. The wait seemed interminable due to the stretching expanse of hallways that exists between every point that takes a person from A to B in Las Vegas – obviously a ploy to discourage anyone from walking away from the casino. Finally though, Mike returned, then Tad.

The lights were set up. I had two cameras ready to go but we decided to shoot with just one. This was just as well because the other camera had a cassette in it that had some footage of my two year old daughter and since I didn’t have the case for it I was happy to keep that footage safe and sound in the camera, away from the grit and grime of a porn shoot.

Tad and I jumped up on the king size bed with the two girls. Foreplay was going sort of ok. I was paired with the friend and she seemed to be warming up to the idea that we would actually be making an amateur sex video. Tad was persistently patient with the sister and she seemed to thaw too. I have to give the guy credit since women actually seemed to really like when he would go down on them… unlike most of the porn studs in the business that the starlets would visibly cringe when guys would head south to work tongues like sand paper over their most sensitive regions. We kept the action moving. Mike kept the camera rolling. The girls moved into position to return the favor. If I didn’t know any better I would have thought we were actually on our way to making some sweet frigging porno action. Maybe I should get the scene for Homegrown I was thinking while I looked down at her sweet mouth as she took my cock in deeply.

The pounding, smashing, frantic and insistent knock at the door snapped me out my reverie. What now?

Penetration, what’s penetration?

In the movie “Orgazmo” Trey Parker plays an earnest Mormon, Joe, who accidentally becomes a star in a porn video and when suddenly confronted with the reality of the director asking for the “penetration” sequence to begin,  Joe, horrified, asks “Penetration? What’s penetration? Who’s going to be penetrated?”  The Director looks flabbergasted and the actress played by real life porn star Julie Ashton explains, a bit exasperated herself, “That is when the penis enters the orifice Joe”.  However, the real answer to that question is buried years ago in a suite somewhere in the Bally’s hotel.

Becoming owner of Homegrown Video meant a few things during those first years when we started running the company. One was that now we had a real purpose behind going to the adult trade shows. Another was working with some of my good ol’ LA porn star friends that I used to make amateur xxx with back in the day when I was still sending in my own amateur porn to places like Homegrown Video. Now combine those two things and you get the recipe for something really crazy… fun… sexual… and possibly even a bit dangerously combustible.

The band at the bar was typical Vegas cheese – a cover band playing disco pop that seemed a perfect complement to all the porn stars, producers, directors, and uber-fans that were crowding out the seats and scaring away most of the regulars with discussions of anal gang bangs and whether or not gagging, sputtering, deep throat cock sucking in videos would bring Johnny Law down on the adult industry with a furious vengeance. The scantily clad waitresses with their cleavage jiggling in seductively revealing scanty dresses that pushed their boobs up in a way that was guaranteed to get guys buying more drinks and paying bigger tips were already getting tired of being hit on with the come on line of the century “How would you like to be in a porno?”

(to be continued…)