Top Ten XXXmas Homegrown Video Wishlist

Ten Things Homegrown Video wants for XXXmas from that jolly kinky ol’ dude wearing big black shiny boots, wearing a big black leather belt, and wielding a whip with authority:

  1. Lindsey Lohan finally decides to release her “stolen footage” amateur porn video through Homegrown Video
  2. A pair of underwear that says “fuck me quick, I wanna make amateur porn”
  3. A threesome with Rachel Maddow
  4. Big brass balls that jingle when you tickle… I mean shake them
  5. Hugh Hefner to leave us his private amateur porn collection shot during the glory years at the Mansion
  6. Enough sex lube to last a year of making anal sex videos for Homegrown Video
  7. An electric shaver with a palm attachment that is also safe to use on the ball sack.
  8. A dong that doubles as a bong and fits in a thong
  9. To get Victoria’s Secret catalogs to stop airbrushing out the nipples and keep it real like they did in the good ol’ days
  10. For enough happy customers to keep Homegrown Video in business for yet another beautiful year!

Homegrown Video’s twelve days of XXXmas

1. One women cumming
2. Two lovers fucking
3. A threesome for the evening
4. Four loads a spunkin’
5. Five fingers touching
6. Six screaming orgasms
7. Seven days a-fucking
8. Eight makes an orgy
9. Nine sixty nines
10. Ten toes a- curling
11. Eleven cream pies dripping
12. Twelve Homegrown Videos to watch!

Daphne from  Homegrown Video

Daphne is a Homegrown Video superstar

Homegrown Video Encyclopedia – Homegrown Moment

The Homegrown Video Dicktionary defines a “Homegrown Moment” as the critical instant when the action going on in front of the camera spills out and engulfs those behind the camera. The most infamous Homegrown Moment occured during a live web cam show on

Daphne, the voluptuous girl next door that worked at Homegrown Video briefly, was scheduled to do a cam show with Homegrown Video owner Tim Lake while a british television crew was taping a segment for a Channel 4 documentary series. The crew possessed a tall and very handsome Italian cameraman who was a former high fashion model. As filming progressed, making a show of a show, Daphne who had stripped and proceeded to masturbate herself into a feverish state, sweat on her upper lip, lips quivering, her eyes shooting fiery stars, she pointed at the cameraman.

The director called “cut”.

“What do you want?” He asked.

“I want him to join me.” Daphne said with a very fiendish smile.

“Only if we can do anal.” He replied in an accent but no accent could hide his sarcasm as he assumed this would put her off the notion.

Daphne paused and considered the ass fucking option. She didn’t even spend enough time thinking about it though to even blink. “OK” she said.

The cameraman spent a shocked minute or two in silence. All eyes were on him. What would the director say? What would the producer’s do? Would he ever get another job with C4 again? Could he even get it up if he wanted to in front of everyone there?

The moment when he decided, yes, I am going to accept her invitation to ass play – that instant – that is a Homegrown Moment.

We left the room so the cameraman and Daphne could play and enjoy the wham-bam-thank-you-ma’am style fucking that keeps folks toes curling and smiles glowing. One more great moment in the annals (get it?) of Homegrown Video.

Daphne’s first Homegrown Video shoot

As has been noted before,   I would never have had any sort of issue of these sorts if it were not for my upbringing which is a mix of cherished though weathered Southern gentility mixed with a dash of East Coast blueblood aspirations. Those affectations are to this day like a starched suit of propriety worn over a leopard print dong thong. Dressed underneath the pleasant manners and the stuffy cordialities there is only the half naked, fully sweaty, panting hard, trappings of a bona fide sex fiend ready to be exposed. So trying to maintain acting all dressed up and unruffled while all the while feeling the completely nude emotion of intense sexual desire was literally causing me to sweat. And a sweaty guy with a couch in his office that innocent young San Diego girls would take their clothes off and lie on was not making Daphne’s friend change her mind about amateur porn at all. The way she was looking at me I might as well have had horns on my head, a pointy tale, and sitting in a fiery office chair.

But when the going gets tough, then the tough get hard… and make some porn!

I won’t bore you with the details of what we did sexually; what would be the point? You can watch that video in or catch it in the “Eye Contact #2” from Homegrown.  Suffice to say it was all that and a cherry on top that left me smiling for days and led to many future videos and wild sex adventures – I guess most of  which was captured for the camera. And who can forget when Daphne worked as our “naughty secretary” who was on a live cam all day… the fact that she loved to hike her panties aside and play with her wet pussy all day was certainly a plus  for our fans, but  the downside was  having other work to do… lesson learned. All sex and no work is no way to run a porn biz.

And what about Daphne’s porn hater pal? She stayed in the office next to where I was fucking her BFF, not long though, as soon as the sounds of our frantic fucking began to echo down the hall she was out of there. Leaving Daphne stranded in the clutches of a dangerous pornographer?  What are friends for if you can’t fuck them or be fucked over by them, right?

The funny part is that Daphne and her friend did make up and start talking again… Only to find out that while Daphne had become an amateur porn queen and Homegrown Video legend, her pal was working in a jack shack with twisted perverts paying her hundreds of dollars to pee on them. The wonders of this world never cease to amaze me.

Homegrown Video sex kitten Daphne is back!


When Daphne made her first Homegrown Video scene, which was featured in the Eye Contact series in volume two, she looked just about as innocent as could possibly be – imagine if all the virginal buxom heroines from Disney movies going back to Snow White, to the Little Mermaid, to Pocahontas all suddenly came to life and became suddenly self aware of their sex drives.  I could barely believe she was sitting in my office to interview about doing naked pictures and making sex videos. I had to keep blinking and saying “you sure you want to…” and “you know this is x-rated amateur videos…” Matters were not helped by the fact that she brought her absolutely stunningly pretty friend with her that was completely suspicious of my motives. She was basically sneering at me while I tried hard to avoid looking like everyone’s favorite stereotype of the evil porn king bent on turning confused young ladies into wanton sluts and made to bend over and take a big dick in the ass so others could pay for the privilege of watching their innocence defiled.

The more I told her, the more interested she became. I was trying to scare her off but instead it was having the absolute opposite effect. She was becoming intensely turned on while her gorgeous pal was becoming increasingly disgusted.  Finally, I asked Daphne when she was ready to start. “Today.” She said with a very mischievous smile. (Her pal groaned and rolled her eyes) Ok. This was the moment where I raised my hands and eyes to the heavens and thanked God and Country for having the best job on the planet. Daphne’s pale, flawless skin, her beautiful green eyes, and tremendously bounteous bosom adorning her curvy body were making me sweat; the conflict of wanting, on the one hand, to respect her innocence, but on the other, ravishing her and rocking my cock in her mouth until I dumped a load of cum on her nose was like suffering the torments of the damned. (to  be continued…)